troubling times

First off, I need to let my mom and mother-in-law know that I’m fine. They worry about me when I post gloomy things on my blog. But writing about stuff helps me sort out that stuff, put it into perspective, process it, and ultimately get rid of it. Sometimes, I even get some helpful feedback from y’all out there 😉

Life seems depressing right now. I’ve been inundated with students who seem to have problems beyond the usual: one who was hospitalized then kicked out by his wife; one who has panic attacks and missed almost half of the semester (though this one is milking his excuse); one who was diagnosed with depression recently and has been sleeping 20 hours a day; another, from the summer, who tried to kill himself but has at last contacted me to take the final. I guess I’m glad for that last one.

At church, we had a rather intense board meeting the other night in which we discussed the revelation of at least 2 registered sex offenders who attend regularly. I know every congregation, community, school, organization, etc. must deal with this issue, but it’s difficult to discuss–let alone contemplate. We informed all of the teachers today and reminded everyone to have kids use the buddy system while using the bathrooms. This last point makes me especially sad. I know several kids–not necessarily mine, who routinely try to get out of going to church–who think of the church as their second home. They won’t be able to view it as “home” any more. Maybe this is for the best, but it still makes me sad.

And then there’s the air, which has kept me house-bound for the last couple of days. The dogs are going stir crazy, I’m cranky and headachy, and we’re all driving each other a bit nuts. Today a touch of sunshine appeared, and it cheered me immensely. I’ll take the dogs out anyway, but I know the air won’t be good for my already sore throat. Sigh.

Tomorrow, it’s back to work and all of the grading that awaits. And meetings, lots and lots of meetings next week. Another heavy sigh.

So where’s the joy? I’m looking high and low for it. Isn’t the holiday season all about joy and spreading that joy around? From Elf:

The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear.

I sang at church today, though it didn’t give me much joy. Maybe the choir rehearsal of Christmas music this Thursday will help cheer me. Maybe Jake’s string project concert tomorrow night will do it. Or maybe commencement will fill me with joy. Something needs to do the trick…doesn’t it?

About BJ

living the dream in northern Utah
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1 Response to troubling times

  1. tomorrow says:

    I will come to your office and say inappropriate things. The gloom is getting to me a bit, too.


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